When I saw that Brother Perry had taken steps to start a blog that would not only connect alumni of Rho Chi, but also keep current collegiate alumni informed of what alumni are up to and serve as a connection point between the two, hundreds of ideas began swirling in my head in terms of topics to write about on a periodic basis.
From record reviews, to general updates, to snippets when music has impacted in ways it wouldn’t without Sinfonia in my life, the list was endless. Then I thought to myself how little reflection I had done in terms of Rho Chi and Phi Mu Alpha since graduating from Fredonia in December of 2009. Without surprise, I came to some pleasing (and not too pleasing) conclusions.
First off, this is the only time (I hope) I will be writing this much in one blog post. But there is something about those first few months after graduating (and being in the same area as your collegiate chapter) that is surprisingly difficult to juggle. Now, in my unique situation, I will be starting my graduate work at the University at Buffalo in the fall for my Student Affairs Administration/Higher Education degree, so I have had a little more down time than I would like. However, it has allowed me to look at the scope of;
How does an alumni Sinfonian best interact with their alma mater/former collegiate chapter?
After 6 semesters with Rho Chi, figuring out how to best interact without being too overbearing weighed heavily on my mind. I was always one to make sure my 2 cents was heard, if not more, and I felt that graduating meant my time debating and planning for fraternity events and so forth was WELL past its prime. Yet, I still wanted that same thrill from coming together to work on, create and perform music with the same men whom I had grown such a close bond with. I thought to myself, what kinds of chapter activities should I come to, what color nights should I make it a point to be at, how can I contribute musically to the chapter without intervening too heavily, and so on.
I’ll be the first to admit that I am not the most talented musician, but will always have a drive to constantly grasp the feeling you get when a group of people get together to sing, and the reaction and the atmosphere that a room gets when its filled with song. My fondest memories of Sinfonia are singing to folks at various homes throughout Chautauqua County, and seeing smiles on dozens of faces just by the combined sound and expression of men in song. That was the one thing that I felt the alumni me could not find as easily as the collegiate me.
The last thing I wanted to do was come across as the “one with nothing better to do but come back and stick around when the real world is calling.” Right now I am working full time, saving some cash, waiting for graduate school to begin, but in the meantime, there is not much to do while I wait until the next chapter of my education begins.
Obviously, a lot of this comes off as ramble and blabber, as many who read will call the idea of being hesitant to come back as foolish and silly. However, these kinds of convictions (or lack thereof) are hard to grip until you actually sit there and ponder the best way to handle such a drastic emotional change. I think back to what I was doing at this time last semester, preparing a group of probationary members for their path to brotherhood, and can’t help but struggle to find a common ground between where I was, where I am, and where I hope to be.
The only way I can describe where I am now, and where I will be until late August is Sinfonia limbo. Figuring out how to capture that musical spirit on my own, with my fellow alumni and with my chapter all at the same time, while keeping a balance of my own piece of mind in the process is my ideal “goal.”
With a work schedule always changing, getting used to no longer living the “college” life, finding that free time to connect with alumni in the area, finding time to make it back to Fredonia, preparing for graduate school, finding time to knock stuff off of my “post-college to do list” and still getting 8 hours of sleep and fostering my outside Sinfonia relationships is a more difficult task than I imagined.
However, there is nothing that can make the world align once again than putting on one of my favorite pieces of music, reconnecting with myself and realizing how lucky I am to have had the 3 years of collegiate Sinfonian experience. And I know that without Rho Chi, without Phi Mu Alpha and without Sinfonia, I would not be able to connect with music in the incredible way that I can, even in the most mentally confusing of times.
Please, do not think of any of these thoughts, observations or talking points as bad things/criticisms or anything of the like. Rather, lets gather around and discuss the different perspectives and ideas we have thought as alumni, and better yet, what people have done to overcome similar thoughts, and of course, the perspective from the collegiate perspective.
That is all I have for now. And now that my initial rant has ended, please tell me what to write about next, or to stop writing? Whatever the case, comments are much appreciated. And I promise in the future, more concise writing and a slightly more focused topic!
In Alpha,
-MCTwist
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